Frequently asked questions?
The most frequently asked question by far is...
WHAT WORKS?
(as in 'what works' to advertise my business?)
well you can either click here
or I have injected a little bit of sarcastic humour in to my replies below.
(Please.......it's 'tongue in cheek' - don't take it too serious!)
Q. Do you build websites?
A. Yes
Q. Do you do design work?
A. Yes
Q. Do you do print work?
A. Yes
Q. Do you work for nothing?
A. No - other than if you are a brand new customer we will give you a hour free - what we would call 'an initial consultation' - other than that we charge.
Q. How much will it cost if I get you to do work for me?
A. It will cost £25 per hour +vat
Q. Will you tell me before hand how much a particular job or project will cost?
A. Yes. It will cost £25 per hour +vat. We will give you a quote before hand.
Q. If I forget to mention other work I want you to do in that particular brief that I give you to base the quote on ... will you do that additional work free?
A. No. It will cost £25 per hour +vat.
Q. Not even if I pretend I am your 'mate' and call you 'mate' every time I speak to you?
A. No. It will still cost £25 per hour +vat.
Q. If I get thousands of leaflets printed do I stand I 'snowball in hells' chance of walking the streets in the rain delivering them myself?
A. No.
Q. What about if I buy the paper lad a Twix and bung him a fiver do you think he will keep his word and deliver all 10,000 leaflets.
A. No.
Q. But lets just say he did. Do you think most people just chuck junk mail straight in the bin anyway?
A. Yes.
Q. So do you think I should just get the 10,000 leaflets printed - deliver the first 47 myself , get sick and leave the rest to gather dust in boxes in the garage?
A. No.
Q. So, Is what you are trying to say that in this modern day and age I would probably be better off getting a website?
A. Yes.
Q. Ok, so with the website if I tell you that my mates babysitters second cousin once removeds 17 year old mate over the road who has been to college and does websites for free as a tactic to undermine you..... will this reduce the cost of you building me a professional website?
A. No.
Q. Once you build my wesbite will I be able to phone you up and complain that I haven't gone straight to the top of 'Google'?
A. No.
Q. Am I coming across as a bit of a 'cowboy customer' because really I haven't got any money and at heart I am a bit of a dreamer?
A. Yes.
Q. Oh well ok then. I get the message. So, is what you are really trying to say is that you would rather help people (based on 15 years of dealing with people (not all) but some like me who won't be advised and go ahead and waste their money anway?) who want to pay for an an honest professional service?
A. Yes.
Q. And that once you help these people expand and market their business's you can cite them as succesful examples of projects you have completed to other potential clients?
A. Yes.
